A Halloween Tale

1/45: can't resist... not after that one!
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Fri Aug 28 05:42:46 1992

[This is an early Halloween story. Feel free to add anything you like ...]

Yes, it was a dark and moonless night, when Ondo Vlacek returned from the dead. It had been an unusually short summer. Already the leaves were turning, falling from the trees and swirling in mystical patterns along the narrow streets, although it was not yet September. The villagers were suspicious of this change, and rightly so. They knew the old stories about what was *really* in the hideous castle up on the mountain. Children were warned not to play outdoors after dark, and the old grandmothers whispered ancient prayers and hung protective herbs and icons above the doorways and windows.

Meanwhile, in Bloomington, Indiana....

2/45: Meanwhile, in Bloomington, Indiana...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [I am Naked!]
Date: Sat Aug 29 15:17:22 1992

... The Flash was just putting the final touches on his halloween costume. It was an incredibly awesome suit, complete with...

3/45: complete with...
Name: Jack B Knimble #170 @8270 [Validated!]
Date: Sat Aug 29 16:26:31 1992

still frozen turkey hotdogs, strung with monofiliment line, sewn to the Flash's Black Cape in a spiraling pattern. Hundreds of Hot Dogs made the cape heavy but the Flash didn't mind because he knew that when covered with Heinz Katsup they would attract the recently risen Ondo Vlacek, the flash's enemy from the grave. But simply attracting Ondo Vlacek wouldn't be enough, he'd have to ...

4/45: he'd have to...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sun Aug 30 04:36:46 1992

outwit the fiendish creature long enough to lure him toward the elaborate mystical trap he'd been slowly preparing for many years, & at last it was ready. once inside, vlacek would be imprisoned through all eternity, never more to torment humanity, fattening himself on the blood of the innocent.

flash's vendetta against the cruel vampire went back many years. it seemed...

5/45: it seemed...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [I am Naked!]
Date: Sun Aug 30 11:49:55 1992

that it all began back when vlacek was caught running naked through the flash's neighborhood. All the people were screaming in terror, and turning to stone... the flash had never been the same... as a matter of fact, he hadn't been able to put on so much as a pair of socks since then.... until now with his costume, which was only because it was absolutely necessary in order to save the world from the evils of...

6/45: the evils of...
Name: Jack B Knimble #170 @8270 [Validated!]
Date: Tue Sep 01 11:14:23 1992

vlacek (who else). But Vlacek was not alone in his blood thirsty quest for pleasure. There was also his consort, Ratasha, sex incarnate, knowing beyond experience, mind reader in the dark, invisible in the day, hypnotic voice, but also dependent on Vlacek, lost without his quest, her quest. Against this powerful duo, the Flash had only himself, his collection of McGuiver tapes, and...

7/45: his collection of McGyver tapes, and...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [I am Naked!]
Date: Tue Sep 01 15:14:02 1992

his proton pack. It was a genuine Ghost Busters II proton pack, capable of capturing ghosts and transporting safely into a ghost trap. It was a good question whether it would work against Vlacek or Ratasha, but it was all he had. The Flash also nearly forgot that he had the help of one...

8/45: that he had the help of one...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Tue Sep 01 22:33:55 1992

Molly Malloy, mildmannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper. Well, maybe not so mildmannered at that.... she was pretty gutsy and nervy, for a dame. (transporting this story instantly into a 1940s black & white film) She'd already won a Pulitzer prize for singlehandedly cracking the Case of the Mold Menace that had threatened to wipe out her native Chicago several years before. She sensed a hot story in this Vlacek thing, especially the part about his sexy girl partner, which was new to her.

The nights were getting colder and windier, and the leaves were racing down the street like kids escaping from school. The genealogists stopped hanging around in Rosehill Cemetery, and went downtown to Ladyman's Cafe for some good hot coffee. Someone turned on the radio, and there was Garrison Keillor reciting a more-than- usually-gruesome Halloween story. The evil enigma was affecting everyone. Radio stations were going silent and even the stalwart engineers couldn't figure out why. In Leesburg, Dan Upson's father reported the birth of a two-headed calf.

And Molly Malloy couldn't get her lighter to work. Curiouser and curiouser.....

9/45: Molly
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN<

So Molly decided to start asking questions, like any good reporter. She went to the local doughnut shop to interrogate police. The shop was crowded. The crime rates had recently hit a low. She sat down next to a rather plump man who had on a sheriff's badge.

After a few questions, Molly learned that there were fluctuations in the amount of power the electric company was putting out for no apparent reason. Molly decided to follow up. She knew there were bound to be clues there.

10/45: Bound to be clues there.
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Professional Sinner]
Date: Wed Sep 02 15:05:30 1992

She went directly to the electric company and asked the receptionist to answer a few questions. The receptionist, being blonde, offered little help, and when she asked if she could look around, said no and ushered Molly out the door. Now, anyone who knows Molly knows she's stubborn. She quickly ran downtown and purchased a hard hat and yellow jumpsuit. She then returned to the receptionist. "Hello, I'm here to check the electric meters," she said to the blonde receptionist. "Hmm... 'kay... *chomps on gum*... right this way..." was the response. The now-deceived receptionist showed her through the swinging double-doors to the back room. Aha, she now had access to information that may just be able to explain some of the problems... Meanwhile, back at the Gate, the Flash was having problems with a hacker... a hacker by the name of

11/45: ... a hacker by the name of...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Thu Sep 03 03:57:55 1992

Abdul Kahmal Mahnoor! Yes, the man in a fez was back, and he was very unhappy. He'd spent the last six months in a rehabilitation resort, after having flipped out as a result of the Harmonic Riot. Never mind all that, now, though. He was out for revenge.

12/45: He was out for revenge.
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Professional Sinner]
Date: Thu Sep 03 15:15:22 1992

Yes, he wanted revenge against Molly. Her father had destroyed Abdul's family karma several years before, causing endless suffering and pain to him. Now that Molly's father had passed away, Mr. Mahnoor felt it was only just to take it out on Molly... he planned to..

13/45: planned to...
Name: Jack B Knimble #170 @8270 [Jack B Quick]
Date: Thu Sep 03 22:22:29 1992

give her to vlacek. And the watch as vlacek and Ratasha slowly pleasured her to death. Capturing her would not be easy. He knew that he would have to trick her. Flash was the key. If he could get Flash to bring Molly to him than his revenge would be doubled. But how? A trap? Flash wanted Mahnoor so bad he could taste it, and mahnoor knew that Molly's reporting style often led her into danger. Was the flash a sucker for a love letter? Was Molly a sucker for a hot tip?

14/45: was Molly a sucker for a hot tip?
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Fri Sep 04 04:26:17 1992

You bet she was.

And just now she was emerging from PSI Energy, shaking her head over her notebook in which she'd carefully noted down the meter readings. There was the power fluctuation, just as she'd been told; but there was nothing to show where it was coming from. In fact, it actually seemed to be coming from nowhere. After a few hours in the library, Molly was still further perplexed. There was only one possible source for those power fluctuations; a disgustingly old abandoned house about thirty miles from town. No one had lived there in about a hundred years. Sure, the obvious conclusion was that's where Vlacek and Ratasha were shacking up. But how were they managing to affect the electric flow? What the hell did they have up there, anyway? Molly wandered outside and sat down on one of the stone benches overlooking the parking lot. She lit another cigarette (having resorted to wooden matches, 'cos she'd spent a fortune on lighters in the last three days and none of them worked!) and brooded for an hour or two. She was surprised to see how late it was. As she arose to depart, a tall, mustachioed blond man in overalls approached her, carrying a small package. "Here, this is for you," he said, and collapsed to the ground.

15/45: this is for you," he said, and collapsed to the ground.
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Professional Sinner]
Date: Fri Sep 04 06:54:42 1992

She decided to ignore the man, because she never liked mustachioes that much, and besides, he was a nobody, and top-notch reporters don't associate with nobodies. She opened the package. Inside of it was another package, which she opened, and found to contain....

16/45: and found to contain...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sat Sep 05 06:13:27 1992

...A Book...

[bet you thought i was going to say a black bird statuette!... well, that's another story.]

17/45: ....A Book...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Beyond Help]
Date: Sun Sep 06 10:07:37 1992

labeled "How To Build a 50 Megaton Bomb Using Only Household Materials." She leafed through the book... and on the back of the title page, she found a hand-written message. It said:

18/45: It said:
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN< (Re) [....A Book...] (By) [The Flash #3 @8270 [Beyond Help]]

"You are in great danger! Do not go into the abandoned house. It contains vampires! Flee before it is too late...."

Like any good reporter, Molly ignored the message and started heading straight to the house...

19/45: Of course...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Wed Sep 09 06:12:07 1992

Molly wasn't so dumb as to be unaware of Mahnoor's insidious ways. She knew about his vendetta against her father, and she couldn't help but think that wouldn't have ended just because Pa was six feet under and two thousand miles away, in Clyde Park Cemetery. (Getting a little previous, aren't we? Geez.) After all, she could think of a couple of things she'd still like to tell him. She suspected the note had been sent by Mahnoor, because it was just a little too obvious.

Also, she wasn't so dumb as to realise that Vlacek either really *was* a vampire, or *thought* he was, and in either case the traditional vampire remedies should work. She had a lot of things with her--garlic cloves, a silver crucifix, a vial of holy water, that sort of stuff. She hoped not to kill Vlacek (that was why she didn't have a wooden stake) but keep him docile long enough to get the exclusive interview she was after. And the same went for Ratasha.

Meanwhile, the Flash was getting his costume and sundry contrivances together, to do more than keep Vlacek docile... when the phone rang.

"This is Malloy. I'm going to check out a lead on Vlacek. Meet me there." "Wait! Where are you?" But she'd already hung up.

20/45: Meanwhile back at the ranch...
Name: Jack B Knimble #170 @8270 [Jack B Quick]
Date: Wed Sep 09 11:49:50 1992

Vlacek and Ratasha were just finishing a good belly laugh. Vlacek turned down the volume on the reciever and adjusted the video relay. "You are a dog!" ratasha cooed. "but sending that book to the reporter was genius!" "It was so obvious she wouldn't resist" Vlacek yawned. Little did Malloy know that the book she was dragging around was sending the words and image of her every conversation directly to Vlacek's waiting ears. And to ratasha's seeing eyes. The ranch was really a large steal trap, baited, and waiting to snair young nosy women and not let them get away.

21/45: official cop-out (just 'cos i'm tired)
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Thu Sep 10 04:22:02 1992

Meanwhile, the Flash, alarmed by Malloy's cryptic call, gathered up his equipment and raced out into the dusk...

22/45: and raced into the dusk...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [SuperSlug]
Date: Sat Sep 12 21:58:28 1992

he wasn't sure why he was so alarmed. Never before had he been bothered by Molly doing something dangerous. She had always seemed so cool about that sort of thing that he just assumed that she would be perfectly safe. But not this time. It must have had something to do with the fact that he recognized just how dangerous Vlacek was on his own... now that he was hooked up with Ratasha, the danger was at least quadrupled. His heart was racing. He knew not how deadly they could be. He hoped they would not be too much for him to defeat. Molly was just about to leave from the library (where she liked to hang out when she wasn't out looking for the hot story...) when the phone rang. She picked up the pay phone which was producing all the noise and a strange voice screamed, "*H*E*L*P* *M*E*E*E*" This confused her greatly. Why would someone call a pay phone for help? Was this really serious, or was it just some sort of prank? Was it Vlacek? If it was, why was he calling her? And how did he know she was there? Her questions would have to go unanswered, and she would not be likely to spend much time thinking about this in the future, as she was about to embark on the most excitingly nerveracking journey of her life.

23/45: .....
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sun Sep 13 21:11:58 1992

"Hello? Hello?" Molly listened a few seconds more, trying to hear any background noise that might identify the source of the call...

24/45: call...
Name: Jack B Knimble #170 @8270 [Jack B Quick]
Date: Mon Sep 14 12:48:02 1992

(as an aside...If you want me to help with this story I need more time than I've got....) all she heard was that clanking of chains, a dog barking, and a T.V. theme song...

25/45: ...and a tv theme song
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Wed Sep 16 04:57:08 1992

"they're creepy and they're kooky mysterious and spooky, they're altogether ooky, THE ADDAMS FAMILY"

26/45: THE ADDAMS FAMILY"
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Happy, happy! Joy, joy!]
Date: Sat Sep 19 16:50:06 1992

Then, the song changed. It sounded like a rap. Yes, this was Addams Groove by MC hammer. Apparently, some fool had remade the old tv series into a movie, and ordered Hammer to sing a song for it. It upset her so much thatshe...

27/45: she...
Name: Jack B Knimble #170 @8270 [Jack B Quick]
Date: Sun Sep 20 20:03:58 1992

lost track of what she was doing, forgetting why she was where she was and what she was thinking...it only lasted a second befor she left. Ratasha was hungry for Chinese, a person, not a restaruant. Her taste buds could tell the genetic traits of the average white american back to the European middle ages. And she was convinced that sucking so much blended blood was giving her an ulcer. She wanted ethnic. Was the reporter chinese? She mused about it a second but knew the odds of this kind of double treat were slim.

28/45: No, Molly was anything but Chinese...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Tue Sep 22 06:20:36 1992

...unless you want to believe certain anthropologists. Her much- maligned father had been half-Irish, half-Cherokee Indian, her mother an expatriate Russian princess, producing an unusual but not unpleasant combination. Molly was not exactly Rosalind Russel, but neither did she have to put a bag over her head. Would this be ethnic enough for what's her name? Only time would tell. Molly jumped into her pink '57 Plymouth Fury (with tailfins of course) and roared off into the fragrant night, on her way to the greatest story of her career.

The Flash, meanwhile....

29/45: Was
Name: The Traveler #29 @8270 [Manly Man]
Date: Wed Sep 30 15:45:38 1992

caught smoking crack in the hallways...This upset Molly so much that she decided to...Go back to her house, retrieve a fully loaded sawed off shotgun, and when she returned, much to the Flash's suprise, she fired, but not bullets, but...

30/45: but not bullets, but...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [SysOp of Justice]
Date: Sun Oct 04 10:39:56 1992

she quickly fired her receptionist for incompetence. She then grabbed the flash, stared into his eyes, and kissed him. He looked confused and startled as she apologized for her behavior. She explained that she had never seen a man with such a perfect body before, and couldn't resist (sorry folks... I just had to say that). He understood, but asked that she not do it again.

After all this was over, she returned to her original quest, and...

31/45: then Dani...
Name: Ladden #101 @8270 [Vampire Maiden]
Date: Sun Oct 04 15:04:45 1992

came and took her by a lock of hair and threw her across the field then she...

Read:(1-45,^31),? :

32/45: left.
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [SysOp of Evil]
Date: Mon Oct 05 15:58:58 1992

Meanwhile, Vlacek...

33/45: meanwhile
Name: Big A #212 @8270 []
Date: Mon Oct 12 19:45:01 1992

he was sitting on the toilet at home when...

34/45: when...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Tue Oct 13 04:04:51 1992

...the telephone rang (of course). even vampires have things like that happen to them.

35/45: Fortunately
Name: Ezor #28 @8270 [The All-Important Nothing]
Date: Wed Oct 14 12:24:04 1992

his manservant flash was there to answer the phone.

He took the extension into the bathroom giving it to his master. Its for you, he said, and would you like me to stay and wipe you sir, he added.

36/45: HE SAID
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN<

Yes please do.

37/45: Yes please do...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [SysOp of Evil]
Date: Sun Oct 18 09:22:04 1992

So the Flash cringed, and pseudo-dutifully reached for the SOS pads (much better than charmin, mind you).. just as his master was least expecting it, the heroflash grabbed a gun and fired...

38/45: what was flash doing in vlacek's castle?
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sun Oct 18 12:42:01 1992

well, he'd gone up there and been captured! molly, having taken a different route, had gotten stuck in football traffic. flash was wisely playing it cool until he could get his ghost/vampire trap back, which vlacek had carelessly tossed on a shelf in the kitchen.

needless to say vlacek laughed at the gun, but he shouldn't have...

39/45: For the gun
Name: Ezor #28 @8270 [The All-Important Nothing]
Date: Mon Oct 19 14:36:49 1992

was full of silver bullets. Which flash used to shoot all of vlaceks werewolf guards...unfortunately greenpeace heard of this and are still harrassing flash to this day...vlacek cried and booted flash out of the story.

Meanwhile molly decided to go to the football game, since you was already stuck in the traffic, little did she know....but this was no ordinary football game..........It was a night game!!!

40/45: suddenly
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN<

someone was smart enough to turn the feild lights on.

41/45: to turn the field lights on...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [SysOp of Evil]
Date: Wed Oct 21 15:38:48 1992

with the lights on now, they started the game. It was the vampires vs. the werewolves... the werewolves were quick, but they were probably no match for the indestructable defensive lines of the vampire team. The kickoff was amazing, it went just over...

42/45: ...it went just over
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Thu Oct 22 06:00:56 1992

the head of the tall, silver-haired gent in the fourth row.

"Almost caught it that time," he said calmly.

43/45: almost caught it...
Name: Ezor #28 @8270 [The All-Important Nothing]
Date: Wed Oct 28 13:32:05 1992

it sailed on and on...it seemed to float there forever...as a matter of fact it did float there...everyone floated even the tall silver- haired gent in the fourth row...he smiled as he watched his seat move farther and farther away...for he was the evil and diabolical, mad scientist Ezor...he had it this time after 20 years of research and calculations...of everyone laughing at them...he had proven them wrong...he had changed the earths mass to 0...he smiled, very proud of himself...unfortunately he floated out of the range of the earth's atmosphere and suffocated...he didn't even have time to gloat or even to see the end of the football game!

44/45: No!!!
Name: Potatoe #208 @8270 []
Date: Wed Oct 28 15:34:11 1992

But his calculations were wrong. It was only 0 gravity for a few moments. He sailed back into the atmosphere and plummeted down to earth, and then landed with a SPLAT!! His intestines were strewn everywhere but he managed to force them back in and go find a doctor.

45/45: go find a doctor...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Thu Oct 29 01:10:14 1992

but lo and behold, the only doctor who was open for business was --

41/50: dr. for business was-
Name: Big A #212 @8270 []
Date: Thu Oct 29 17:58:00 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

Dr. Giggles, well that ruined everything because-

42/50: well, that ruined everything because...
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN< (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

because he was an incompetent doctor. He did not know an appendix from a table of contents...

43/50: Or
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN< (Ms) [Reply not needed]

a foot from a yard.

44/50: or a one liner
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sat Oct 31 01:14:13 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

from a real contribution to this story!

Anyway, Ezor was pissed. He was more than ever determined to conquer the earth. He stomped back to his office, grumbling about incompetent computer whizes (and he should know). There were several messages on his answering device. Most of them were the usual, about crop circles and third density vibrations and the Ascension which was to take place Oct. 29 (in spite of the fact it was already Oct. 30 and nobody'd Ascended) but the last message caught Ezor's attention. A voice like Peter Lorre with a frog in his throat sibilated from the machine. "Mr. Ezor? I'm Rocky Rococo--better known to you as Abdul Cahmal Mahnoor. Valuable information can be made available to you for a price. I know where the girl is, Mr. Ezor, and her foolish friend. You haven't much time left. Come to Rose Hill Cemetery at midnight tonight. And bring ten thousand in cash. I'll be waiting."

45/50: as he...
Name: Big A #212 @8270 []
Date: Sun Nov 01 17:00:06 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

entered the graveyard gates, he could hear the sound of an owl. then he shot it. (THUD) then from behind the tombestone he saw him it was-

46/50: he saw him it was-...
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Satan's Brother]
Date: Thu Nov 05 21:15:24 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

William "Refrigerator" Perry, carrying a six pack of *HONDAS* under his arm. He looked..

47/50: as happy as a clam.
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Thu Nov 05 23:26:06 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

He walked up to Mahnoor, griffing broadly, and gave him the Hondas. "I just got done reading John Lennon's book," he explained.

Meanwhile, the vampire prince was watching FIGHTLINE, with Ted Copout!

48/50: fightline,
Name: Big A #212 @8270 []
Date: Fri Nov 06 17:50:43 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

when he had a heart attack. then the tv turned in to swiss cheese. after 3 hours of weird stuff, he finaly woke to see the humongous big bad smelling...

49/50: big bad smelling
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sat Nov 07 03:02:33 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

mess that was left when the Gods got through with Big A for messing up the story. Well anyhow, Mr. Perry and Mahnoor were sitting behind Hoagy Carmichael's tombstone relaxing with a cold beer, when Dr. Ezor finally staggered in through the Third Street gate. He came up around the soldiers' memorial and on back to where the two reprobates were. He was exhausted. "Alright," he said, "Here's your ten thousand, Mahnoor. This better be worth it." "Relax," Mahnoor sibilated. Dr. Ezor sat down and Perry handed him a beer. "This could take all night," Mahnoor added, "you might as well make yourself comfortable."

50/50: comfortable."
Name: The Flash #3 @8270 [Satan's Brother]
Date: Sat Nov 07 11:23:27 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

When he heard that, he wished he could just go home. Somehow, Dr. Ezor just couldn't be comfortable in a cemetery... maybe it was the horror movies... maybe it was the cold stone of the tombstone he was sitting against... or maybe it was the 6' zombie that was creeping towards him... nah, it was probably that he had eaten too much pizza before coming out. The zombie was, in fact, creeping towards them...

48/50: creeping towards them...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sun Nov 08 04:21:19 1992

(Ms) [Reply Requested!]

... which Mr. Perry didn't like at all. "Man, what's in this beer?" he muttered. "Hey, you, go haunt somebody else!" The zombie just kept on for them. There weren't a lot of ghosts in the cemetery that night; most of the population had gone on into the city for the usual dumb goings-on, leaving just a few old geezers to sit on their tombstones and gripe about the younger generation being a bunch of gadabouts and so forth, the same things they said every Halloween. So they weren't any help, either. Even Hoagy wasn't around, are you kidding? The last place he'd want to be on Halloween is the cemetery, he was out partying his head off. Besides, you don't know what the hell goes on in the cemetery on Halloween night, and Hoagy didn't WANT to know. Mahnoor wasn't fazed. "Come on over and have a beer," he chortled. Dr. Ezor said, "Are you crazy? You don't know what it'll do to us."

49/50: DON'T YOU KNOW WHAT HE'LL DO TO US?
Name: >UNKNOWN<
Date: >UNKNOWN< (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

Manhoor said he'll kill us, and I'm glad, there's just too much pressure in theis world.

50/50: He was obviously stoned to the gills,
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Sun Nov 08 20:32:53 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

and not on beer, either. Ezor wasn't the kind of person to take opium wisdom for an answer. He grabbed the pizza (where the hell did that come from) and jumped up and whacked the zombie over the head with it. "Back to Hell with you," he roared. The zombie let out a very satisfying yell and turned tail and ran off down Fourth Street, where people just thought he was one of those stupid high school kids.

Ezor returned, breathing a little hard, but not too bad for someone nearly 70.

"Now you," he said, addressing Mahnoor, "pull yourself together and give me that information." "Have you got the money?" Mahnoor said, showing himself to be a lot less stoned than he was pretending to be. "That's what I came here for," Ezor said, and shoved the fat envelope into Mahnoor's hand. He had to wait while the sleazy weasel counted it. "Very good," Mahnoor said. "The fool who thinks he can trap the vampires has been trapped himself, and is languishing in Vlacek's castle. The girl is on her way there now. There's no escape for either of them. But I'll take you there if you want." Ezor agreed, and the two of them made off for Ezor's car, while the confused Mr. Perry decided it was time to go back to Chicago and go on a very strict diet.

49/50: Ezor and Mahnoor head off to castle Vlacek!!
Name: Ezor #28 @8270 [The All-Important Nothing]
Date: Mon Nov 09 09:52:13 1992 (Ms) [Reply not needed]

The large buick of doctor Ezor rolled methodiously through the back alleys of transylationia. It seemed they had been driving for hours and still they had not reached the first intersection...Suddenly Dr. Ezor noticed he had left the car in neutral...but it was too late--they were out of gas... Mahnoor was becoming impatient...he was fidgeting like a poodle in heat...Ezor suggested they use the experimental fuel that he had stored in a pickle jar in his trunk...Mahnoor agreed to settle down long enough for Ezor to pull out a pickled male poodle....thereby calming Mahnoor...he then poured the remains into the trunk and they prepared to take off for vlaceks castle...unfortunately Dr. Ezor goofed again and forgot to account for the production of anti-matter at plasmic temperatures......

.....several million miles away the universe began its inevitable collapse as a black hole formed in what was once a small blue planet...

50/50: meanwhile, in palo alto...
Name: Melanthe #129 @8270 [Coffee Cat]
Date: Wed Nov 11 00:16:49 1992 (Ms) [Reply Requested!]

... Dan Upson scowled with uncharacteristic ferociousness as all the colours on the screen swirled down the hole in the middle and the screen went blank.

In Chicago, Molly Malloy's editor sat in his ancient wooden swivel chair, chomping nervously on his cigar as he tried to get a call through to her.

And as for the Flash...

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